I have been married now for quite a few years and I am only 26 years old. We would not have it any other way, but we understand that we are very young to have gotten married. I met my husband when I was 19 years old. It was pretty much love at first sight. More like love at first pint because we used to sneak to the pub together after work.
I had two pretty serious relationships before I met my now-husband. As I get older and I look back on those relationships. The bitterness has passed and now I just think about it as a lesson rather than a failure. I thought that I would sit down with you guys and have a chat with you about past relationships. Also, my outlook on them now.
I got into my first serious relationship when I was just 14. We were together for 2 years, which is a long time when you are that young. We were each other’s firsts for everything. That is a pretty special thing. We broke up because we lived far too far away from one another. And when you get to the age of 16, there is temptation all around us and we were just sick to death of not being with one another. We were going crazy not being with one another, so we broke up. Because our families were the best of friends. We still had to see each other, and it hurt me for so long after. Each time I saw him I was heartbroken all over again.
I only really got over my first boyfriend when I got with my second boyfriend. He seemed to take all of the pain away because we just got so sucked up in one another. For years, we were as happy as the day is long. I then discovered that he was cheating on me with somebody he was at university with. This time around, I was more humiliated than heartbroken and incredibly angry. I didn’t know what to do with the emotions that I was feeling and I fully shut down and turned into a very bitter and sad person. I turned into a grumpy person and bad company. Honestly, I knew what I was doing, but I just couldn’t get myself out of my funk and I was so angry that he had turned me into that person.
Almost a decade later, and now happily married, I am able to look back and realise the lessons and positives that I took from those relationships. The thing that I needed to get to this point, is time. I needed to forgive, trust and move on.
My first relationship, was sad as it was when I finished, I realised that what we had for one another wasn’t love at all, it was infatuation and excitement. But the years that we were together it was innocent and romantic. We got to travel together, didn’t have an adult responsibility in our lives and we just parted ways because we were so obsessed with one another, we couldn’t get our fill of each other. There was a realisation that we were not meant to be with one another romantically.
The second boyfriend is a much bigger wanker and somebody that I could still punch in the throat. Even though I am grateful for what he did because it set me on the path to meet my husband. I still think that he is a shitty person. Sometimes you just need to call a spade a spade. There were happy times though and that relationship taught me a lot. We were just branching out into adulthood and it was all new to us. We both made many mistakes with one another. I am so glad that I made it with a douchebag like this. Rather than my amazing husband that I am with now.
I would love to hear from you guys and see what you think. Have you had past relationships that stung like a bitch at the time? But as you look back, you are looking with fresh eyes and an appreciation for how it made you grow. I fully understand that it can take time for you to get there. Today, I have made peace with the past.
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