Today, it is time for another mental health blog post. As you guys know, I am a massive advocate for talking openly about mental health. I think that by talking about it openly, we break down the stigma and we end up helping more people. For completely transparency, I struggle with OCD, anxiety and depression. At the moment, I have absolute clarity and I am doing really well.

Don’t get me wrong through, it is now always like this. Sometimes, when I am going through a bad time, I need to speak to people. As supportive as the people in my life are, sometimes I can tell that they are like a deer in the headlights. We don’t all know how to talk about mental health, nor do we all understand it. In this post, I am going to share how to speak somebody regarding mental health.

 

 

Maintain Eye Contact

The first thing that I am going to mention is all about maintaining eye contact. This goes even broader than this really, because it is about improving your listening skills. I believe that most of the time and with the best of intentions, we always want to jump into a two-way conversation. Sometimes, you just need to sit down and listen. When you are sat listening to somebody, give them your undivided attention. Use non-verbal communication, don’t go on your phone, don’t be wandering out of the window and ensure that your mind is fixed on nothing but what the other person is saying. By using your eyes, you can let them know, you are the only thing that is on my mind.

 

Use Empathetic Language

Empathy is the key to all of this. When I used to speak with my husband in the early days of our relationship, it was like he didn’t care. I believe that he did care, but because it was a far cry from how he felt. Not to mention that he had never spoken to anybody previously, or known anybody that suffered with their mental health, it was like I was speaking a foreign language. He quickly had to learn to be empathetic. He might not understand exactly how it feels, and I hope that he never has to, however, he has got so much better at putting himself in my shoes. Be empathetic and engaging when you are talking to them. The last thing you want is for somebody who is opening up to close back down.

 

Show Genuine Interest

Most of what I am talking about here is just about having good conversation and listening skills. The most important is showing genuine interest. I can remember when I first started talking to my family about how I was feeling, they looked at me like I was crazy. Think that some of them did try to engage in conversation, but the look on their face made it clear that they thought it was anything and nothing. I was mentioning it because it was serious, they treated me like I was moaning about a one-off headache. Educate yourself on mental health. Ensure that the person that is opening up to you, knows that you are there with them. You are interested, and you want to speak about mental health.

 

Ask Them Deeper Questions

I can remember when I was early on into my mental health journey and sometimes it would feel like I was talking to a brick wall. I think that people don’t want to engage and ask too many questions through fear of upsetting you. That isn’t the case though. Asking questions doesn’t have to be a grilling or an integration, it just shows that you want to have a deeper understanding. This can be a hard thing to do, but analyse your relationship, get a feel for how much you can ask and just go for it. People with mental health issues aren’t all weak, you can ask questions.

 

Know Your Limitations

Sometimes like mental health, we are not experts. We also are unable to see what somebody is dealing with privately. When you are speaking to somebody out their mental health, don’t try to fix their issues. Them reaching out to you isn’t them wanting you to take away all of the pain. They are reaching out to you to be a sounding board. Know your limitations. People that work in mental health have studied for years to be qualified to speak to people who are in very emotionally unstable situations. If things are getting heavy, calmly let them know that you understand and you are listening. However, you would like to support them in getting professional help. Somebody did this to me and I was incredibly grateful.

 

I know that speaking to somebody about their mental health can be a minefield. Try to speak to people to help them. Also, allow them to lean heavily on you if they need it. I feel like I have honestly put my husband through the wringer so much over the years by how much I have unloaded on him. If he saw a post like this all of those years back, it would have done him the world of good. It can be incredibly hard, but as I mentioned, know your limitations and recommend for somebody to speak to a professional if it seems appropriate.