Over the past few years I have been seeing somebody to try and help with my OCD. Whether it is working or not is still to be reviewed, however one thing that continued to come up during my sessions was the extremes that I go in order to please other people. More often than not, putting myself second to everybody else to make sure that I can put a smile on their face.

I was given the task to try and be a little more selfish with myself. To prioritise what I want, when I want it and to be more cautious with who I wholeheartedly want to support. With that said, in this post today I am going to share with you some of the things that I have stopped apologising for and how I am prioritising myself.

 

 

Saying No to Friends and Family.

The true people pleaser in me would always say yes to absolutely everything and it was tiresome, to say the least. I am an introvert through and through, so the things that nourish me the most are taking time and actually saying no to social events. Around last year there was a time when I didn’t have a free weekend on my calendar for around 12 weeks and I bloody hated it. I now say no which is liberating in itself, but I also don’t give people an explanation as to why I don’t want to do something. No is enough.

 

Feeling Deep Emotions.

These last couple of months, since I actually started to function more like a normal person. I have got lots of deep emotions which I normally try to compress because I don’t want to seem like an overly emotional person, but why am I doing that and for whose benefit? Now I allow myself to feel the things that I want to feel and I am not apologetic for doing so. The truly good people in my life had loved seeing me open up so much more and they support me endlessly because I am honest about what is whirling around in my head.

 

Not Liking Something.

For so many years, I would tell people that I liked something in order to appease them and stay on their good side. The thing is that these days I don’t really give a shit if I am not going to stay on somebody’s best side for sharing my honest opinion. There is a fine line between being honest and being hurtful, so there is a way to do this where you stay on the same side as being respectful. It is truly liberating to say the things that you mean and not have to bend your own thoughts and opinions to suit.

 

Wanting to Do Things Alone.

I love spending time by myself. It feels like it is something that people find a little bizarre about me. I know that most people do enjoy the company of other people, but I am somewhat of an introvert, so I have embraced doing more on my own. Every now and again I may plan to go on a nice country walk around where I live. People will try to invite themselves along with me and I have to politely remind them that I want to be on my own and I am very firm about it.

 

Changing My Mind.

So many times, in my life I have had comments from people for changing my mind. Whether it is over something small and trivial or a big decision, you can get negative comments or judgment from people for changing your mind at any point. It is in our human nature to change our minds and try to grow and develop. I do not see myself generally as an indecisive person Every now again I may change my mind and that is not something to feel apologetic for.

 

Ending Friendships.

The older that you get, you realise that there are people in your life that you no longer need in your life because they do not provide your life with anything positive. You absolutely 100% do not need to be apologetic for cutting people out of your life who no longer give you any sustenance in your life. Make positive changes to the people in your life and make changes where necessary. I have culled my friendship group considerably and I am so much happier for doing so.

 

Looking After Myself.

You know what, every now and again I want to shut myself away from the world. I give myself a pamper evening. Which does not need to be commented on by a single person. You do not need to be apologetic for something that makes you feel better. This for me is normally shutting myself away. Have a good old pamper evening. Eating crap food which is normally an Indian takeaway for me and watching whatever I want on the TV!

 

I hope that you guys liked this blog post. If you are a little like I used to be, you feel like you can make some of these changes. We have the right during our life to be unapologetically ourselves and we never have to apologies for doing something that we want to do and pleasing ourselves. It was an adjustment for me and I kept having to pull myself to one side and give myself a good talking to. But I am so glad that I stuck with it because I am just much happier with myself now and it has made me a much more confident person overall. Make sure to leave me a comment down below. Let me know where you are and if you are unapologetically yourself!